Infinite

I dug my toes in the sand and settled back into the makeshift sand chair I had carved so delicately with my feet moments ago. I had promised myself I’d come back to this spot earlier in the day when I just couldn’t handle it all. There was the mom and her child playing in the shallow water of the ocean, a young couple walking along the edge of the water escaping the final pushes of waves lovingly with a childish joy that can’t be falsified. Further there was a group of young men who had arrived at a sand bar, the sense of accomplishment easily visible from my towel in the sand. Far beyond there was that horizon of where the sky comes down and touches the ocean. Mesmerizing isn’t it, that infinite sense the ocean gives us. I thought of that American Beauty quote about there being so much beauty his heart felt like it would burst. Usually I see this broken world full of pain, sadness and insecurity; but in this moment, everything was right. There was just so much coming at me at once I had to close my eyes and just enjoy these blessings.

When I returned there was no couple or group of young men, in fact it was just me as far as I know. I looked out at the ocean water illuminated by the moon above and thought back to that quality of being infinite. There really aren’t many things on this place that we haven’t conquered; nothing left that offers any sort of mystery. And I thought about all of the times I’ve heard about separated loves in books or movies growing up looking at the moon or the sky at the same time so that they would be looking at the same thing. And I thought about what was over that imaginary cliff where the ocean and sky collide. I remember thinking that if I looked straight ahead my eyes would be surely meeting with someone else’s on the other side, sitting in their own sand chair. Even though I couldn’t see them, maybe I couldn’t even speak their language; someone is looking back at their mystery. And in that way I am very much connected to that person. And I thought about the beauty and the pureness of the ocean connecting us and I thought just as I am connected to that person I am connected to that mother and child, to that happy couple and to my friends up in the room. I prayed for that person’s well being, possibly that they were granted the answers they were searching for infinite darkness of the ocean. We are all part of this wonderful and broken world that has been created and connected to everything in it, for we all share the same father. And maybe that’s what made it make sense to me, why I was seeing all of this beauty, the realization that the ground I was standing on was holy, the air I was breathing was holy, and that I am living in tune with everything that surrounds me. For we are all of our creator and if something is of our creator it is good and it is loved. Therefore I have a bond with my friend across the sea stronger than any worldly bond I can form.

And then something strange happened, I teared up. Here I was just taking in all of this beauty God has bestowed on us and I was shedding tears. I became so distraught at the fact I have friends that haven’t been given the chance to or don’t understand just how much their creator loves them. And I think of how much importance we place on all of these things we do in our day to day lives and I compare them to what it means to show someone the Gospel and how it is we came to be good and broken and forgiven. I think about how much more important where my friends spend eternity and their realizing how much their creator loves them that he would send his son to die compared to the other facets of this life. I prayed that my life will continue to grow closer to the image of my maker and that my faith would be infused into every single aspect of my life. Then I laid back in my sand chair, closed my eyes and thought about God’s grace and all of the beauty in this world, filling my heart to the brim, and thought about the mom and her son, the young couple, the group of men and my friend across the sea, and hoped that they had that same feeling to, and that they realized just how connected we are through our maker.